Be a Goldfish: The Ted Lasso Lesson That Frees You to Move Forward as a Leader

We’ve all had those moments we wish we could take back… the mistakes we replay in our minds, the comments we overthink, the situations we carry a little too long. One of the best leadership lessons I’ve heard didn’t come from a business book or conference. It came from a tv show on Apple TV, Ted Lasso.

There’s a moment when Sam makes a mistake on the field, and Ted walks over and says:

“You know what the happiest animal on earth is? A goldfish. It’s got a 10-second memory. Be a goldfish.”

Simple and unexpectedly brilliant.

It’s true, sometimes the thing that holds us back isn’t the moment itself, it’s how long we hold onto it.

In this blog, I’m going to share a story from my own leadership journey and why “being a goldfish” has become a quiet, powerful reminder.

When Letting Go Is the Hardest Part

There was a season when I started noticing something I didn’t want to admit. I had been investing time, energy, and support into helping some people I considered business friends. We collaborated, shared ideas, and we encouraged each other’s work. Or so I thought.

It wasn’t until I had to stop offering free time, free strategy, free creative thinking that the dynamic shifted. The messages stopped. The invitations ended. Silence replaced the conversations that once seemed genuine.

If I’m honest, that stung a little, because it revealed something deeper:

The relationship wasn’t built on mutual respect, it was built on what I provided.

For a while, every time their posts popped up on my social feeds or a new email campaign hit my inbox, something tightened inside me. Quiet frustration. As this continued I began asking myself “why does this still bother me?”

That version of myself was a problem: distracted, reactive, and wasting energy on something that was only dragging me down. It took too long for me to see that the past pain was overshadowing the present moment and opportunities. Worse, by continually replaying that moment in my head, joy was harder to find in the work I did day-to-day. I eventually moved past it, but it took more than a year! If only I had discovered the secret of the happiest animal back then, but I’m grateful I know it now.

Be a goldfish. Let it go. Reset. Move forward.

Letting go doesn’t excuse the behavior, it frees you from reliving it.

Why Leaders Need a Goldfish Memory

As leaders, we carry a lot. From decisions, expectations, mistakes, and relationships that aren’t always as they seem. It’s important to acknowledge that carrying everything isn’t a sign of strength. Heaviness can easily be disguised as responsibility, and when we try to carry too much, it will affect how we lead in business and personal life.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

• Clarity fades when you carry old frustrations into new decisions.
• Connection weakens when you assume the next person will hurt you like the last.
• Confidence shrinks when you define yourself by moments instead of growth.

When we don’t release the weight, we relive it. (over and over)

Being a goldfish isn’t about forgetting, it’s about NOT letting yesterday decide who you get to become today.

What Letting Go Made Possible

Once I released the resentment, something surprising happened:

I felt lighter.
I felt clearer.
I felt more grounded in who I was called to be.
Our team felt the shift too.

When you’re no longer carrying old frustrations, you can show up differently:

• More present.
• More steady.
• More available for the people who actually value what you bring.
• More confident in how you lead and love your work.

This wasn’t about winning or losing relationships. It was about creating space for healthy ones.

“When you let go of what isn’t real, you make room for what is.” – Goldfish

Consider This: Letting Go Helps You Lead Forward

If you’re carrying something heavy… a moment, a disappointment, a conversation you keep replaying… maybe today is the day to set it down. Not because it didn’t matter, because you matter more.

Let go, get your clarity back.
Let go, reconnect with your purpose.
Let go, lead with confidence again.

I believe Ted Lasso was onto something. The happiest leaders may be the ones who don’t hold on too long.

Maybe the question isn’t “what happened?” but “what could happen if I stopped reliving it?”

Be a goldfish.